Some of the experiences the children and I have had engaging experiment self-responsibility during January and February are as follows.
In the introductory post to ‘experiment self-responsibility I introduced readers to a family experiment I have begun.
To read the introductory post press this link.
In brief there are some issues in our family that were not changing and I made the decision to take action to change them. This is because in our family conversations and talking makes no change, it is only action that anyone responds to.
Reflections on the birthing process
In my experience birth is a natural process that ‘just happens’ if you let it. When I say ‘just happens’ the inbuilt intelligence (instinct) in my body took over during the birthing process and did what it was designed to do, have a baby. This was the same with pregnancy, I had sex and then a whole lot of amazing processes happened that allowed a baby human’s physical body to grow and develop inside my body for 9 months.
God did the designing and creating and I experienced His incredible handiwork and still do not understand exactly how everything was created, developed and happened.
The children are moving out of the house and into their first homes (a tent set up) tomorrow. Each child has purchased a tent setup that will be their home until they go through an attitude shift (an emotional change) in regards to caring for the shared environment and love of others (in basic terms clean and care for their personal and shared living environment and not expect others (mum in this case) to do everything for them, and to see how their choices and actions are causing unloving situations in their lives).
When I was 24 years old I decided it was time to have kids. It was a compulsive feeling that I needed children and I needed to be a mother no matter what.
Before I had children I had the false belief that having children would make me a ‘real woman’.
I thought being a mum was my only role, purpose and destiny in life. I thought that once I was married and had children my purpose as a woman would be fulfilled and life would be perfect like in a hallmark movie. I believed that somehow having children would magically fix everything in my life and make me feel great.
In December 2017 I realised that I wasn’t communicating with the children and I wasn’t taking the time to get to know them or giving them the opportunity to express how they were really feeling or what they were thinking. I also noticed a gap in their communication skills and interpersonal interaction. Partly this is due to the self-absorbed-ness we (the parents) have encouraged in them and part of it is due to their lack of education in how to actually interact with other people.
I felt it was important to begin a process of correcting the lack of education from myself and over the past 5 months we have began to have what I call “family meetings” or “debriefs”. Continue reading